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Recovery Week (Nov 1-7)

I am not good at resting. That sounds like a humble brag, but it is more of a bipolar productivity problem. What I like (in swimming, at work, in life) is either 1) all gas, no brakes. breaking records and taking names. new shiny achievements every day. Or 2) laying like a dead thing.

My mood is not bipolar, just my productivity. I like to get a bunch of things done (well, always, really), but then I do have to rest (being annoyingly human). But once I accept that I do need a break, I’m down for the count, and I don’t always know when I’ll be back up again.

I am MASSIVELY better about this than I was in my 20s, but I feel like that is mostly through willpower (and experiencing the downfalls of the productivity roller coaster), not by a change in my natural tendencies.

One of the guys who invented the microarray ran a lab down the hall from mine when I was a grad student. We got to talking one day and he described his grad school regime – constant work for many months until a paper got published, and then a month completely off doing whatever he felt like and going wherever he wanted. He published some insane amount of papers during his grad school years. I’ve always envied the idea of that schedule, but I’ve never been able to make it happen. Very possibly because after about 2 months of constant work I’m out – not generally enough for a Nature paper 🙂

So I guess the full time schedule I’ll be looking for after I get back the US will be 2 months on, 1 month off 🙂

All of that is by way of saying that the quality of this post may be a victim to the productivity roller coaster. But at least I’ve learned to just go ahead and do whatever it is that I need to pick back up again, instead of waiting to feel like I can make it perfect… let’s see how it goes. If this post is a victim to last week being recovery week, so be it.

[Note added as I am actually posting on Monday the 15th of November – The above is all the more relevant after losing a day on Friday to my Moderna Covid booster shot. But just look at me, not getting in a strut because I’m way off schedule. Haha – you can’t look at me! Am I raging against the machine or taking everything as it comes? Only my pillow will ever know 🙂 ]

The week things fell apart (but not really)

I’ve had my first minor breakdown. (Well, if we don’t count Covid and Spring 2020, when it was unclear when everything in my life would pick back up again, if ever.) I honestly expected it sooner – what with training so hard and having so many other things on my plate… so it’s a a minor accomplishment to stave off a minor breakdown this long.

To be clear – nothing has actually fallen apart, except for my mentality. But here’s the thing – we all live in our own minds. They are really all we have. We think there’s a world out there… but that’s exactly it – we can only experience anything through the lens of our brains. So if my brain thinks there’s been a breakdown, I have to convince it otherwise, or it’s going to operate as if that’s the truth.

One day in college I walked up to my Organic Chem classroom. A couple of people were sitting outside, waiting to go in, and, as I sat down next to a guy I knew casually, I said, “Organic is so stressful.” You know, attempting to forge a human connection over shared suffering. He said, “Only if you make it so.” I still kinda want to punch that kid in the balls. But he had a point – we do make our own realities. Leading to the burning question – why aren’t we better at it? At the end of this week, I am not better at it.

So what happened leading up to Friday the 5th? Several factors (relatively minor things – first world problems of dealing with people and wading through a bottomless inbox), but really initiated by an email exchange with my pilot. I was on a slow simmer overnight, and Friday morning freaked right the heck out.

Me: “I am getting ready to send the contract, just waiting on some feedback from people on what estimated swim speed and crossing time I should use. Is there any deadline for a wire transfer for this deposit? (Other than December 5th?)”

[Context – in the contract, it specifies that wire transfers for the final payment must be made 2 weeks ahead of time. I thought it was clear that I was asking if the same was true for this payment]

Pilot: “The deadline for the contracts and deposit to be with me is 5th December 2021. If the contracts and deposits are not are not with me by then I will be rebooking the slot to other swimmers.”

I literally felt nauseous when I read that for the first time. Like, it’s November 4th. The deadline is December 5th. Is it not clear that I’m asking because I want to make sure that I am on top of things and that my slot NOT be given away?!? 

I’ve spoken with my pilot on the phone 3 times and he seems like a good guy. Hopefully I’m overreacting or misinterpreting or whatever we tell ourselves when we hope that people have [completely freaked us out] unintentionally. 

Anyway, I’m getting all my stuff together and should be able to submit tomorrow, but that (plus the aforementioned other life annoyances) have thrown me into a funk that peanut butter and banana has not yet brought me out of. I kind of feel silly now that I type it out – if you are reading this and wondering what is wrong with me, I’m definitely right there with you. I have faced harder struggles than the nothing that this is 🙂

Although if you look at my freak-out as the struggle, I do have sympathy for that. It doesn’t really matter what the instigation is – once we make something into something, it becomes a very real hurdle to overcome. I think I’m generally above average at overcoming, but I don’t think any of us are immune to, well, being human. Unless you are an android. Please comment below if you are reading this and you are an android!

Finally, it IS recovery week. Recovery and emotional stability just do not go hand in hand for me. I know I’m not the only one. I KNOW that I need recovery right now. But it is boring, de-motivating and depressing. I don’t know why my body and brain are so at odds on this, but ‘twas ever thus.

So, yay that I get to resume the ass-whuppin’ practices on Monday?

PS – Hey Facebook. If someone has publicly admitted that they are freaking out, you making a shocked face reaction at them is probably the last thing they want you to do. 

And I’m Back

Six days later, all is well, the payment (hurl) and contract are submitted. Although I did spend an absurd amount of time this week on sending hard copies in the mail to England. I mean, can we have a civilization here? I felt like an elementary school kid trying to figure out how to address an envelope 🙂 But I’ll send it off, and hopefully (please, please), that will be the end of that.

The email from A’s teacher last night that students needed to bring in headphones almost re-broke me. I’m sensing a common theme here of “gahhhh! Stop asking me to do stuff!! I have enough stuff to do!!!” Maybe I should get over that, but after a year of not having a bunch of extraneous crap to do, my new opinion is that the world should get over that. Is everyone else out there enjoying endless book fairs and picture days and fundraisers, and, and? I had no idea how much of my life’s blood they were sucking until they went away. And don’t get me wrong… I love to support the kids’ schools and activities and have always been very involved. But now it just seems so… relentless.

But this time around I’m reacting with only appropriate levels of annoyance 🙂

Bad Jokes

I was running out of bad jokes, but someone just told me that they liked them, so I will carry on. It’s nice to know that people are out there 🙂

Joke #1

I got kicked out of the swimming pool today.

Apparently the breast stroke isn’t what I thought it was.

Joke #2

Did you hear about the butcher with a sense of humor?

He was a comeatian.

Not according to himself though – “I won’t tell jokes in public… I would butcher them. The steaks are too high.”

First cold swim of the season

It was a pretty big jump from the mid-70s to the mid-60s. I felt fine, but we only went for about an hour. The wind was… maybe not brutal, but insidious. A sneaky, internal-warmth-stealing wind.

I got that odd torso furnace feeling – I’m really glad that my body is capable of cranking up the heat, but, at least so far, it never fails to feel really weird.

The wetsuits (and fast Joe) left me in their dust. Fast Joe should come swim with Michel!

Random Thoughts

I read another Fredrik Backman book, “And Every Morning the Way Home Gets Longer and Longer.” It’s short and very good. It got me thinking about my love for “A Man Called Ove” – I saw the curmudgeon… and the curmudgeon was me.

And never say that this blog is not keeping you up-to-date on the issues of the day – skimpflation, in my very own laundry room. (That label has been saying “33% more” for years. But it’s particularly hilarious when it is demonstrably LESS.

England Business (Nov 1-5)

Monday, most of my England work was, “Nope, still waiting to hear back from schools.” I STILL need to organize my lists, but signing the contract (and paying the deposit) and starting to look for housing are up next, I believe.)

Wednesday was more school stuff for England. It is taking so much time. But if nothing else, the possibilities are getting whittled down. I also read through Paul Foreman’s pilot contract. It looks fine – I’ve got to figure out what “passport sized photo” to include. And I emailed Jenny S. and Charlotte B. for help trying to figure out my “estimated swim speed and crossing time.” Paul’s payment info is still saved in my bank, so it should be easy enough. I’ll print out the form now and wait for answers.

Thursday – a 20 minute conversation with a school for A to kick off my morning. Man, do I love English accents!

The Week at the Pool

Summary – Recovery Week

Pool Yardage ~30,600

OW Swim ~3500

Temp – 64

Total yardage ~34,000

I’m kind of starting to regret the Thursday of the 6:02 500 free – THIS Thursday (11/4, a full week later) was the first time I felt looser instead of tighter and tighter. I’m still calling the chiropractor – there is stickiness in my shoulders that no amount of tennis balling is going to be able to fix. And trust me, I’ve tried – tennis balls are cheap!

Friday was my breakdown and renewal. I really like Dr. Williams and going to see him made me feel better in body and mind. And thank god for Ned D. and Charlotte B.- they got back to me quick, asked the right questions, and gave me answers for my estimated speed and crossing time that seem reasonable (and I trust them). Recovery week is about a lot more than just what goes on in the pool.

The downside to this week is that I don’t feel nearly as recovered as I would like to. The upside is that if I’m going to have bad weeks, now is the time.

The Gory Details

Monday 11/1 – Theme: Straight-up legit recovery practice (~4400)

I was going to get out after 5000… but we never got that far.

I swear that I could hear all of the muscles in my body go “Oh, thank god.”

I think part of recovery week should be not feeling like I need to record every detail (and instead go eat food) so… some free and back drills, some fly drills, some fly tempo work with headphones for both kick and stroke, some easy swim, some fast swim, some cool down. Yay. Laters.

Tuesday 11/2 – Theme: mini-Annihilation Tuesday (~10.000)

My shoulder is still a bit dodgy, but this was definitely the easiest 10,000 yards I’ve ever done.

Practice 1 – (Pre-senior) (~6400)

This set from Coach Macon was the mentally easiest way to get in 3,000 that I’ve ever experienced:

• 4×150 no free IM on 2:35
• 400 free on 5:20 (I wore fins)
• 4×150 no free IM on 2:45
• 400 free on 5:20 (fins)
• 4×75 no free IM on 1:20
• 200 free on 2:40 (fins)
• 4×75 no free IM on 1:25
• 200 free on 2:40 (fins)

It went by really fast and just didn’t seem like that much

Practice 2 –  (Gold) (~3500)

We did some fin stuff and a 300 for time (3:41 without breaking a sweat). Then we worked on turns for a while, then an IM set.

Yay.

Wednesday 11/3 – Theme: Halfway through recovery week; shoulders still knotty ropes (~5000)

Warm up, and then a set of twice through 3x5x100 (kick/IM/Free) on not hard descending intervals, with 100’s ez in between each set of 5.

I put on fins for the second round… didn’t seem to help much. If tennis balling my shoulders goes as poorly tomorrow morning as it has been, it’ll be time for the chiropractor.

Thursday 11/4 – Theme: Let’s Make a Deal (~5500)

We could pick a lane, but had to stay in it no matter what w/o we got. My lane got 5000 Tiger IM

300 ez

1600 w-up

3600 of a 5000 Tiger IM

Shoulders felt pretty tight, even though I went ez

Friday 11/5 – Theme: Fun with Coach John (~5600)

• 300 w-up
• 6×100 descend 1-3, 4-6
• 100 ez
• T-30: 2250 (easily held 1:20’s the whole way – a relief, since I said I could do that)
• 2.5x
• All with fins and paddles
• 4×25 from a scull fast to 12.5 :30
• 50 ez 1:00
• 2×50 fast 1:00
• 100 ez 2:00
• 100 fast 1:30
• 150 ez 3:00
• (Rnd 1 fr, Rnd 2 bk)